Guys Who Failed At Being Tough
How tough do you think you are? On average, most of us don’t think we’re that tough, nor do we have a reason to be tough. There are some men out there who think they’re so tough they’re invincible. In reality, they have a bigger ego than they do muscles. This leads them to believe that everyone is afraid of them and that they can get whatever they want. We’ve never understood what purpose it would serve for these men to have everyone fear them. They’ll post on social media bragging about how easy it is for them to break a door, or how excited they are to beat someone up, but nobody takes them seriously. Do you know any guys who claim to be the toughest stuff?
Are You Done Reviewing Yourself?
Why do you check the reviews under products you’re thinking of purchasing? Most people just want to make sure they’re getting a good deal or a quality product. Others, like us, check the reviews as a form of entertainment. We guarantee you’re bound to find juicer gossip and stories here than on Facebook.
Take this man reviewing a simple mouthguard for example. It’s clear he just wants people to think he’s macho and tough. When the people around him weren’t telling him what he needed to hear, he took to the Amazon review section to brag about his machoness. We’re sure there are a few names that people call him, but badass is not one of them.
One of the Boys
Some people post things simply to get a reaction from others. We don’t see any other reason why someone would post something like this. This woman is trying to present herself as just another dude, but she presented herself as a ball of confusion instead. Maybe she has taken down men twice her size, but we have serious doubts as to the rest of it.
If she was as smart as she says she is, she would have realized that she spelled “brain” wrong. Unless she has some sidekick named Brian who is seriously hindering her ability to live her life. If that’s the case, we hope she lets him go soon.
Not the Flex You Think It Is
Have you ever met one of those guys who live to bring up fantasy invasions? They spend all hours of night and day preparing for the unlikely event Russia or China will invade the United States. You’d think if this man cared that much he would join the army, or do something practical to protect the country he cares so much about.
Instead, he got this tattoo of our flag. We’re not sure what he thought would happen if Russia or China saw this. Were they supposed to run away quaking in fear at this man’s bicep tattoo? We have so many questions for him, sadly we don’t think we’ll be getting many answers.
Mr. Macho Fighter Over Here
Why do so many men think that getting in fights is a flex? It seems it wasn’t enough for this guy to brag to his friends, he needed the internet to know too. If you were to ask us, we’d say getting into fights that escalate to such violence is nothing to be proud of. We don’t know who he’s fighting or why, but we’re almost certain there’s someone out there who is more skilled than him.
In regards to the one-liner’s comment, we highly doubt that it’s true considering the fact that he needed to write an entire novel about his fighting experience alone. Why do you think he’s so set on wanting people to think he can fight?
Lacking Human Decency
What do you do when you see someone smoking a cigarette in public? Most of us cough loudly and wave the smoke away to get our stance across. If you are a smoker, it’s important to be respectful of others and only smoke in designated areas. However, if you want to smoke a cigar, you need to do that in the comfort of your own home.
If you do smoke a cigar in public, be prepared to receive backlash. This man only smoked his cigar in public so that he could get the satisfaction of puffing the smoke in someone’s face. Just when you think someone can’t reach a new level of disrespect, they stoop to this level.
No More Monkeying Around
How would you feel about encountering a chimp in the wild? Most normal people steer clear of areas where there’s a lot of wildlife because they don’t want to take the risk. The only people who go seeking these dangerous situations are photographers or men with egos the size of Canada.
In almost every story of man versus wild animal, the animal has won by a long shot. It’s unclear why this man thinks he’s the exception. He’d be lucky to escape a chimp fight with all of his limbs and even a shred of dignity. Still, if he’s willing to put this theory to the test, we’re more than willing to sit down with a bucket of popcorn and watch.
Have You Heard of Gun Safety?
There are some people in this world we’ll never understand. Take Elon Musk for example, he’s very involved in the technology world, and in his spare time, he makes a fool of himself online. Everything we have learned about this man has been against our will. Never once have we cared what other people put on their bedside tables, but Elon sure does like to share!
What did he think we would feel after seeing this photo? Were we supposed to suddenly gain a great deal of respect for him, or think he’s cool? The only thing we’re thinking is how unsafe it is to have a gun laying around like that, especially considering Elon has young children.
Biker With a Death Wish
Did you know that when seat belts first came out some people refused to wear them out of the fear that it made them look weak? Well, it looks like times haven’t changed, as much as we wish they would. We’re so thankful for all the new gadgets that have come out to keep us safe while doing the things we love.
We’d ride our bikes in a bubble suit if we could, so it goes without saying that a lot of protective gear would need to go into us getting on a motorcycle. This biker seems to think he’s immune to getting into an accident. It doesn’t matter how good of a driver you are, anything can happen on the road and you should always be prepared!
Cool Guy Over Here!
How much time do you spend thinking about people you dislike? If we had to guess, you don’t care enough to sit around and ponder all the things they do that you hate, like their smoking habits. The funny thing is, this guy likely has no haters, if anything the person he’s referring to is his mom who pointed out the dangers of smoking weed.
The only other possible explanation for this post is that he wanted to brag about the fact that he smokes, but didn’t know how to casually mention it. This is definitely going to be one of those moments he cringes about when he gets older.
Not Something to Brag About
Social media started off as a fun way to connect with others and share about our lives. Sadly, there are some moments on social media that make us regret our entire existence. We’ve never understood why some men feel the need to brag about how violent, or angry they can get.
Bragging about being in “a scary psychopath mood” isn’t the flex this man thinks it is. If your goal in life is to make people feel uncomfortable and worried about your presence in their lives, then go ahead! As for the rest of you who want to have friends and relationships, consider going to therapy and working on your anger management.
You Should Be Afraid
We love t-shirts that represent who we are as a person. We’ve had shirts that say “cat lover” or show off our favorite brands. It’s nice to get a glimpse of someone’s personality through what they choose to wear, it tells us whether to befriend that person or steer clear. For example, if we saw this guy out in public we’d know to go the opposite way.
It would be a lot easier for this man to wear a shirt letting the general public know he couldn’t care less if they lived or died. It’s good to know he’s unafraid, that’ll come in handy when he inevitably gets himself into travel because of his anti vaxxing and anti masking standpoint.
Armed and Dangerous
We don’t know why so many people insist on taking a gun with them everywhere they go. More often than not a gun does more harm than good. Needless to say, guns are a heavy topic of conversation, especially online.
There are some people who have intellectual conversations and choose to listen to the other side, and then there are guys like this. If you think you are in any position to end someone else’s life simply because they do something you don’t like, you shouldn’t have a gun. You should also probably go talk to someone about your feelings because this definitely isn’t a normal thing to say.
What Did Breakfast Do To You?
We know that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but some opinions are just plain wrong. Food is a basic human need, and nothing about it makes you lazy or arrogant no matter what time of day it’s consumed. We wonder how this man came up with such an idea, and why he feels so strongly about it.
If we don’t eat breakfast we’ll become a HANGRY mess and have a horrible day, which it seems this man has been plagued by. Would it kill him to have an omelet with a muffin every once in a while? We want to feel bad for him, but something tells us he’d call us wimps for doing so.
The Alpha to End All Alphas
Have you heard of the phrase “Alpha Male”? If not, allow us to explain: an alpha male is a man who sees himself as a leader, and deserving of respect. This comes as a surprise to nobody, but more often than not, these men do nothing to deserve respect and are incredibly pompous.
We’ve never heard of Nick Adams, but apparently, he sees himself as such an alpha, he needed to put it in his Twitter name. What we know about Alphas is very surface-level, but it’s safe to say if any other man posted this photo Nick would make fun of him for posing in such a manner. Have you ever encountered such a species of alpha male in the wild?
Someone is a Bit Overprotective
Kids are a blessing, and it can be hard for some parents to watch their children grow. Unfortunately, kids getting older is a part of life, and eventually, they’re going to want to start dating. There are two ways to approach such a situation.
You can be there for and support your child, or you can be like this dad and scar your daughter as well as any future man who wants to date her. We’ve never understood why dads have such an obsession with keeping their daughters single, don’t they want them to be happy? The sad thing is, no dad would care enough to say the same thing when it came to his son dating.
Stay Clear of This Guy
Do you like driving? For some of us, driving is calming, and it’s nice to be able to sit and listen to music on the way to our destination. For others, driving is scary because we’re constantly worried about the other people on the road. You never know who is drinking while driving, or who will fly into a fit of rage after you honk at them for nearly crashing into you.
It seems this motorcyclist has gotten honked at one too many times for his comfort, so he got this shirt. If you’re asking us, what he really should have gotten was driving lessons and a therapist who specializes in anger management.
Our Spidey Senses are Off
What do you think of superhero movies? We love them just as much as the next person, but it seems this guy likes them a little more than that. Some people feel influenced to act differently after seeing some movies, and this guy was called to act like a modern-day Spiderman.
Part of us wants to feel comforted by the fact that he wants to protect his city. The other part of us feels like we’d need protection from him considering he has such easy access to this large of a knife. At the very least he didn’t have to post this online, he could have just moved in silence.
Consider Yourself Warned
You never know what kinds of crazy people you’ll run into on social media. Most of us only expect to see posts from our friends, family, and local food bloggers. Occasionally you’ll get a sighting of the local loon, like guys who make a point of letting you know the status of their nuts.
We think it’s hilarious that so many men equate hobbies, or having interests in this world with being toxic or somehow unmasculine. Maybe if this guy had a hobby he’d be less of a pain on the internet, do you think we can get him into baking? Part of us wants to see what he tweets, the other part knows that ignorance is bliss.
Indecisiveness At Its Finest
Are you a fan of tattoos? We’ve always thought they were cool, but haven’t been able to commit to one yet. It seems this is a common problem amongst tattoo lovers everywhere, like this man. He didn’t know if we wanted to represent the hero or the villain, so he decided to get both.
Maybe he’s been wronged in his life and wants people to treat him better, but there have got to be better ways to go about it. We wish everyone would treat others with kindness, but some people just suck. This doesn’t mean you have to go all Joker on them, the same way you don’t need to rescue everyone like Batman.
Don’t You Think You’re Overreacting?
We wish we didn’t have to spend our time arguing with climate change deniers, but someone has got to do it! It’s unfortunate that these people are so willing to turn a blind eye to a problem that will affect every generation after them. When this person was arguing with an older man about climate change, they realized they were getting nowhere and resorted to saying “ok boomer”.
For some reason this causes boomers to launch into a state of attack and throw out meaningless and awkward insults. This man must have an incredibly fragile ego to be broken down by two simple words. What would you do if your dad sent someone this email?
Are You Sure About That, Bud?
We love memes like this, they’re funny and they also make us think. We’re 99% sure we won’t ever have to encounter a supernatural serial killer, but it’s fun to pretend! Most people respond to something funny, and others take it in a whole different direction. Of course, this isn’t actually going to happen, this man just wants to pretend he’s too cool to call 911.
If we had to guess, this man would crawl into a ball and pray 911 would show up if this happened to him. It seems some people will take this as an excuse to show off how tough they are, but sadly for this guy, we see right through him.
One Too Many Drinks Later
Do you like flying? Most people aren’t so fond of it for a couple of reasons. For one, barreling through the sky in a giant machine we don’t fully understand the mechanics of is scary. The other issue is the passengers. You never know who won’t be able to control the contents of their stomach, or who will drink so much that they’ll threaten to off all other passengers.
This man let the liquid courage get to him and started spewing out whatever words popped into his head. We’re sure he regretted this once sobering up, but sadly, we have a feeling he’ll be put on the no-fly list.
Jesus Wouldn’t Approve of This
What are your thoughts on religion? No matter what you believe, we’d hope that you would respect those who hold a different belief. We’re all entitled to live our lives the way we want, and a big part of this is whether or not we choose to pray or take part in a certain faith.
Some people take others’ atheism very personally, when in reality, what other people believe has nothing to do with them. This egotistical man is very bothered by atheism for reasons we will never understand. Why does he want to beat up atheists so badly? If anything that will make them stray further from whatever religion he is a part of.
Things Just Got Dark
Most people don’t look down their coworker’s shirts because let’s face it, that’s a little awkward. That’s why we’re not entirely sure this conversation even happened, but let’s pretend it did just for a moment. This was just this man’s weird way of trying to get across how cool and mysterious he is.
It’s beyond us why someone would want to be seen as the bringer of death, but then again, we don’t understand half the things men do. If his coworker did widen their eyes, it’s likely just because they were concerned as to why someone would get such a tattoo. We’ll take this as a reminder to never ask people about their tattoos if we’re not sure we want an answer.
Have You Tried a Stress Ball?
Have you ever gotten so angry you thought your head was about to pop off? We’re all human, and anger is a very human emotion. However, it’s important to have coping skills and know how to deal with such feelings, if you have an anger management problem it’s best to seek help.
If you don’t seek help, you might end up like this guy who punches holes in the wall of his house. It’s bad enough to destroy something in this manner, it’s worse to take a photo, post it, and then ask people not to hit you up. There couldn’t be a more desperate way to ask for attention. We feel bad for this guy, truly, but he needs help.
Zero to One Hundred
Do you ever converse with new people on the internet? Sometimes it’ll be fun and you’ll make yourself a new friend. If you’re unlucky, you’ll make yourself an enemy. When making new friends it’s best to avoid saying anything controversial. We never knew telling someone they should get a new shirt would be such a fight starter.
This man could have simply told the person that he didn’t like their comment, or at the very least not told them to shut up. At the rate he’s going, he shouldn’t expect to make any good relationships both on and off the internet. How would you respond to someone who said something so rude?
Fine, More for Me!
Have you ever been extremely ill? We don’t wish that type of pain on anyone. There’s nothing like a headache to come ruin your day, or a runny nose that just won’t quit. That’s why we’re so thankful for modern medicine, we have solutions to almost all of our health problems. We can take a pill, or go to a doctor and expect to feel better almost instantly.
Some people see medication and healthcare visits as a sign of weakness, or even stupidity. No matter how healthy you are, or how much care and attention you put into yourself, you can still get sick. We feel bad for people who think this way, they’re missing out!
Aggression At Its Finest
Have you ever gotten so angry at your door that you had no choice but to punch it? Neither have we, but Drake here isn’t able to say the same. There are so many things you can do when you get angry, like talk to someone, or go for a run. Destroying your property or others is never a good option, and it might make others think you’re crazy.
Doing this is bad enough, but posting about it as though it’s something to be proud of is even worse. We feel the need to inform Drake that doors don’t have minds of their own, and this one didn’t consciously decide to break. Maybe someone should get him a punching bag for his next birthday.
You’d Never Survive a Day In Preschool
Have you ever gotten offended at something seemingly insignificant? It happens to the best of us, but it’s important to deal with these issues accordingly. Boomers for example have yet to master this skill. When someone points out that they are in fact boomers, they become enraged to the point where you can nearly see the steam flowing from their ears.
This guy seems young to be a boomer, but by posting this he affirmed that he gives off boomer energy. If your response to light name-calling is to bash someone’s face in, maybe reevaluate your life choices. Until further notice, everyone should avoid calling this man names.
Is That a Threat?
It’s important to support brands that you feel align with your personal morals and beliefs. We for example don’t support companies that promote hate speech or discriminate. This may be hard news for you to wrap your head around, but some people will only support companies who promote such things.
Nike has made a lot of progress over the years in terms of being more inclusive, much to the dismay of men like this. Now that he’s dared us not to wear Nike around him, we have an overwhelming need to buy head-to-toe Nike and strut in front of his house. We wonder what workout gear he’ll wear now.